Couples coaching, online
What a relationship coach actually does, and how to pick one.
“Relationship coach” is a title anyone can print on a website. That’s the first thing to know about it. Some coaches are excellent. Some finished a weekend course. The title alone tells you nothing, so this page tells you what the work actually is, where its limits sit, and what to check before you hand anyone your marriage.
What the work is
A relationship coach works on the present tense of a relationship: the fight you keep having, the silence that’s replaced it, the decision you can’t make. Good coaching is focused and practical. In my version, we go after the layer under the arguments: the conclusions each of you has quietly reached about the other, and how those conclusions script every conversation before it starts. The method lays that out in full. The container for it is online couples coaching: 60-minute video sessions, a clear arc, and homework that lives in your actual week.
What a coach is legally not
A coach is a licensed therapist’s unregulated cousin, and pretending otherwise is the industry’s worst habit. Coaching sits outside the licensing system: no state board, no clinical oversight, no diagnosis, no treatment. That’s workable when the coach is honest about it and trained enough to know what they’re looking at. It’s dangerous when they’re winging it. I trained as a therapist, I work as a coach, and I keep the line bright: if depression, trauma, addiction, or violence is in the room, you need a licensed clinician, and I’ll say so in the first conversation. The full comparison lives here: coaching vs therapy.
How to vet one, in five questions
Ask where they trained, and expect a real answer with an institution in it. Ask how they decide when someone needs therapy instead, and walk away from anyone who says it never comes up. Ask what a typical arc looks like, because “we’ll see how it goes” is a billing model, not a plan. Ask what happens if it isn’t working. And ask them to describe the kind of couple they turn away. A coach with no wrong-fit clients has no method.
Where I fit in that picture
My training is clinical: a master’s in counseling from La Salle University, a master’s in sociology from UC Berkeley, and an eighteen-month internship at a psychotherapy center in Philadelphia. The rest of the story, including why I moved from therapy to coaching, is on the about page. Judge me by the same five questions. I’d expect nothing less.
The usual questions
Common questions about relationship coaching
Is a relationship coach the same as a couples therapist?
No. A therapist is licensed, regulated, and able to diagnose and treat mental health conditions. A coach is none of those things. Coaching can still be serious, structured work on the pattern between you, but it sits outside the clinical system, and any coach who blurs that line is telling you something about their honesty.
Do relationship coaches need a license or certification?
No license exists for coaching, and most certifications are short private courses. That’s exactly why you should ask about training. Mine is a therapist’s training: two master’s degrees and a long clinical internship, applied inside coaching’s honest limits.
When is a coach the wrong choice?
When something clinical is driving the trouble: untreated depression or trauma, addiction, violence, or control. Those need a licensed professional. A good coach screens for this in the first call and refers you out instead of taking your money.
What does a session with you actually look like?
Sixty minutes on video, usually weekly. We work on the most recent version of the fight: what happened, the moment it turned, and what each of you decided that moment meant. It’s specific and current, and you’ll leave most sessions with something to try before the next one.
How do I start?
You write me a short private note about what’s going on, and I reply within two business days. Then a free twenty-minute video call, where I’ll tell you plainly whether I’m the right fit, and point you elsewhere if I’m the wrong one.